Dustin and I decided to ADOPT, to build our family, in January of this year. We are very EXCITED! We signed up with LDS Family Services and started the background checks.
We decided to do this after 1 miscarriage, 2 false positive pregnancy test, 3 attempts of Artificial Insemination and almost 4 years of trying to have a baby. This included 12000 Metformin pills, 2100 Clomid pills, 120 Femara pills, 90 Bravelle shots, 45 Dr visits, the regular daily pills and tears for the last 4 years.
I feel a sense of peace. A sense of letting go, handing it over to the Lord. I feel a huge burden has lifted off my shoulders.
I have learned so much about myself and life over the past couple of years...
I can not control everything in my life, as much as I hate it. I have seen my true friends and people who love and care about me. I have a husband who is truly sensitive to my feelings and has been there for me. I can have a happy life with just my husband.
Its been rough...I mean really rough.
I don't talk about it because I can't.. I feel its way to personal to let the whole world know. To let the world know about this sensitive part of my life.But there are women out there struggling with the same thing.
I don't talk about it because everyone out there has something they are struggling with too. I could have it worse. I really could.
I came a cross this video called, "I would die for that" by kellie coffey. I love it!
Writing this now, I feel awkward. I hate putting myself out there. but oh well.
Check out my adoption blog, where I really put myself out there. ha